What I Want To Say To My Mom Now That I’m a Mom Myself

Becoming a mom changes you in many ways and makes you appreciate your own mom more. Here are some things I want to say to my mom now that I'm a mom myself.
Becoming a mom changes you in ways that you can never imagine. Not only does everything we do become all about our kids, but we think about things so much differently once we become parents, and we appreciate things in an entirely new way. Once I became a mom, my perspective on life changed so much.  I found myself thinking a lot about my childhood and the importance of my own mother in my life – including shaping me now into the mom that I am with my a child of my own.

Related –> 5 Things I Want to Say to the New Mom

Here are some things that I want to say to my mom, now that I’m a mother myself.

How did you do it all?

My family and I came to Quebec from the UK when I was only two years old.  We came here for my dad’s job, and my mom was a stay at home mom to my brother and me.  We were the only ones from our family to live in North America – my mom was at home with us, without her own family nearby; knowing no one at all, and not able to speak French.

My mom baked pretty much every day; she made us our Halloween costumes; and she taught us both to read before we started school.  Our house was immaculate, my father’s work clothes ironed, and there was always a hot home-cooked meal on the table every night.  I totally took it for granted when I was young, maybe more so once I became a teenager.  I guess I just didn’t think about it – I was just a kid!

And now?  WOW, my house is pretty much in shambles every day, and the nightly meal is often leftovers.  My mom did all that she did with grace and never once complained.  I really don’t know how she did it all.  The amount of respect that I have for her now is huge, and I don’t even think she knows it.

I’m sorry

It seems like there are a million apologies I should say to my mom, I don’t even know where to start.  I guess the biggest apology I owe her is to say that I’m sorry for giving her such a hard time when I was an angst-ridden teenager. I was truly awful to her when she was just trying to look out for my best interests and keep me out of harm’s way – which happened to be the only place I wanted to go.  I’m sorry for all the sleepless nights spent worrying about me, and for talking to her with such disrespect.  I’m sorry for making her feel Less Than, when she was (and still is) so much More Than.

I understand

Now that I’m a mom myself, I know why she did and said the things she did.  Now I get how it must have made her crazy to see me hurting, sad and anxious.  Mama bears look after their cubs above all else.  End of story.

Thank You

Thank you for being the mom that you were and continue to be.  Thank you for being the grandmother you are now to my son.  Thank you for everything you’ve ever done for me.

How do you tell your mom how much she means to you?  Do you give her hug when you see each other?  Do you call her for no reason, just to chat?  Do you tell her you love her?  Do you laugh over the past and look forward to the future together as mother and daughter, and as friends?  I am the person that I am today because of my mom, and the mother that I am to my son because of the parenting example she set for me.

What things do you want to say to your mom now that you’re a mom too? Tell us in the comments!

22 thoughts on “What I Want To Say To My Mom Now That I’m a Mom Myself”

  1. I love this post. Everything you’ve said I know I’ll feel the same. Even without having kids I want to thank her. Mothers are just incredible.

  2. What a thoughtful and poignant post! I don’t have kids yet but I can only imagine how things must change when you become a mom and how your thoughts about your own mother must change! Growing up, my mother would sometimes tell me, “Someday, when you have kids, you’ll understand!” I don’t remember what she would say that too,, but perhaps she’s right lol.

  3. Our moms have sacrificed a lot for us and we won’t realize that until we become mothers ourselves. These are the same feelings that I felt when I had my first child. It’s really going to make you understand why your mom acted a certain way.

  4. Christina Aliperti

    Wow, you took the words right out of my mouth and said them so beautifully. I can not thank my mom enough for everything she has been to me.

  5. Reesa Lewandowski

    I think about this all the time. Everyday probably! Maybe one day I will get the courage to get these words out!

  6. I love this! I was seriously just talking to my mom about this! I have three boys under 6 years old and I always feel like I’m going crazy! I’m so grateful for her!

  7. I was just talking to someone last night about the fact that I am my mother in more ways than I imagined so I owe her an apology for all of the times I told her I would never do what she did

  8. Such a raw and honest post. I love my Mom so much and she is like a best friend to me. She sacrificed so much for us when we were growing up.

  9. I really like the idea of this post given it’s genuine and so authentic + I’ve never seen a post where you pay some attribute to your mom given you now understand what it’s like. I’m not a mom yet, so I cannot do this post, but when I am I would like to. Although my mom have talked a lot about the sacrifices she made for us! xx Adaleta Avdic

  10. This is so sweet! There is so much I wish I had understood as a child and a teenager and so much I wish my children understood. But I guess that is just how it goes a part of growing up!

  11. Honestly I don’t think this is so much becoming a Mom yourself as it is ‘getting older’. I hate to use the term growing up, but it really is. It’s funny I spent a good deal of my life as that angsty teen saying I’d hate to be like my Mom,… now I see all her strengths and hope I’m half the woman she is.

  12. Once I grew up and realized what a nightmare I was as a jr high kid, I remember asking my mom how she didn’t kill me and my sister. She graciously said, she thought about it, but knew we would eventually grow out of it and become a normal person. I’ve alway appreciated my mom and all she has done for my family. We jokingly say, “she is always right, which is her most annoying quality.”

  13. It is so hard to understand motherhood until you are in the depths of it. I think we all wish we could say these things to our moms after we become moms ourselves.

  14. A few weeks ago I was dress shopping with my teenager, I could tell I was starting to annoy her. She was silently blowing her breath when I suggested things, I think she was tired of dress shopping too. Anyway, it made me feel a little upset for myself. I started to go into poor me mode, because here I’m helping her and she’s annoyed with me. THEN BOOM! I thought of the times I went shopping with my mom and I wondered how I may have made her feel the same. I get it now.
    XO

  15. I love this! I totally agree though there are so many things I say now to my kids and think how my mom actually did and said the same things. i am a good mom because of her! great post!

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