5 Easy Ways to Make Your Older Child Feel Special After Your New Baby Arrives

This conversation is sponsored by Luvs at Sam’s Club. All opinions are my own.

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Bringing a new baby home is an exciting time for the whole family, but it’s not without its challenges. One of the biggest challenges that parents of multiple kids face is making our older child feel special when so much of our attention needs to go to caring for a newborn.

My son was 6 when my daughter was born. While he was old enough to understand what becoming a big brother meant, it was still hard on him because he spent all those years getting 100% of our attention. I did my best to make sure he felt special every day, and now I’m sharing my favorite tips and tricks that worked for us to help get him excited about a new sister and feel special after she was born. We’re even sharing tips on how to save time (so you have more to give to your older kids) and money with an amazing deal on Luvs Diapers at Sam’s Club!  You’re going to love it, so keep reading!

How to Help Your Older Child Adjust to Life with a New Sibling

1) Involve older children in your pregnancy

There are so many fun ways to involve your older kids in your pregnancy and get them excited long before their new sibling arrives. Start by letting them be the “first” to know the big news (aside from your partner and doctor, of course).  Include them in your pregnancy announcement, let them help pick out nursery décor (you can narrow it down to a few choices to guide them if you’re worried they’ll pick out neon green curtains).

Older kids will get a kick out of your weird food cravings! Challenge them to come up with fun recipes that incorporate your intense desire for something sweet, salty, savory, and sour all at the same time. Make it a game! On the days when your morning sickness keeps you from even getting out of bed, spend the time cuddling and reading books or watching movies together. Just make sure they feel included as often as possible.

2) Give them a special job

Older kids want to feel needed, so once your baby arrives, assign a special “Big Brother” or “Big Sister” job. Even toddlers can help out during changing time. Ask them to grab you a fresh Luvs from the diaper stacker or to occupy their squirming baby sister while you get her dressed.

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Older kids can be the “checklist keeper.” Give them a laminated list of the things you need when you leave the house and ask them to help you check them off. Pacifier? Check! Favorite blanky? Check! Extra Luv’s Diapers? Check! They’ll feel special and you won’t get halfway across town and realize that you forgot to refill your wipes container!

3) Give them choices

It’s so important for kids of all ages to feel like they have some control over their environment, including their role as an older sibling. Again, you can guide their choices so you’re not giving them final say in major decisions. When you’re at Sam’s Club buying Luvs Diapers, for example, take your child over to the bakery area and ask him to pick between two special treats for dessert. Hold up two different new outfits and ask which he thinks would look the cutest on his baby sister.

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4) Recognize and accept their mixed emotions

As much as we’d love our older kids to be 100% excited about a new baby all of the time, that’s just not how reality works. It’s vital to recognize your child’s mixed emotions and validate their right to have them. Yes, even the really tough emotions, like when your older daughter says she hates her baby brother and wishes he was never born. It’s hard to hear words like that coming from your typically loving child, but you know deep down that she doesn’t mean it.

Instead of lashing out and telling her that she’s being mean or cruel, take a deep breath and recognize the real emotion behind the words. What she’s really saying is that she feels like things are unfair right now, that she misses having all your attention, and that she feels like things were easier on her before she became a big sister. Vocalize those feelings for her and let her know that she has a right to feel however she wants. After you’ve validated her emotions, you can explain to her that while it’s okay to feel angry, “hate” is not a word that we throw around lightly.

5) Set aside time each day for a little one-on-one

Make sure you give your older child as much “mommy face time” as possible by setting up a new ritual. Even if it’s just snuggling for an extra few minutes before bedtime, your older kids need to feel like they have at least a few minutes of your undivided attention each day. If possible, schedule a “mom and me” date every other week (or even once a month) and take your older child out for a special day. Even if it’s just to a new movie for two hours, it will help your child reconnect with you.

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Finding time is one of the hardest parts about being a new mom, whether you have one child or ten, but time is exactly what your older kids need from you. Fortunately, we live in an age of convenience. Unlike our parents, we have so many more ways to save both time and money, allowing us to carve out a few extra minutes to devote to our older kids. Buying Luvs at Sam’s Club, for example, is a fabulous way to do both!

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How Luvs Diapers at Sams Club Saves You Time and Money

You already know that the Sam’s Club stores offer one-stop shopping, but did you know that you don’t even have to leave your house to save time and money with them? They have a fabulous online store and a convenient app, too!

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Right now, when you shop at samsclub.com or the Sam’s Club Mobile App, you’ll get an additional $3 off AND free shipping on any Luvs diapers! Luvs already offers amazing diapers at affordable prices, but with this deal you could pay as little as $.11 a diaper for a five-week supply! Imagine all the extra time you’ll have with your older kids by avoiding last-minute diaper dashes to the store! The savings are automatically calculated at samsclub.com or on the app (they’re not available in-club).

Save even more time by clicking “Save Time With Subscriptions” at checkout and choosing your delivery frequency. Luvs Diapers were my favorite when my kids were tiny because they offer such amazing leak protection for less money. The leak barrier and leg gathers help keep leaks in the diaper, where they belong. Less time dealing with major leaks that result in whole clothing changes with my daughter meant more time to give to my son.

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Head over to the Luvs product page and order your diapers for delivery straight to your door.  You can even do it from your phone! Just download the Sam’s Club mobile app for Apple or Android.

And when you check out, you can sign up for automatic subscriptions to make sure you’ve always got Luvs on hand when you need them.

 

Do you have any more great tips on how to make your older child feel special when your new baby arrives? Share them below!

This is a sponsored conversation written by me on behalf of PG. The opinions and text are all mine.

 

24 thoughts on “5 Easy Ways to Make Your Older Child Feel Special After Your New Baby Arrives”

  1. These are some great tips to include the child during and after the pregnancy. I remember that finding the time after having my 2nd child was difficult but necessary as I also worked full-time.

  2. These are great tips for parents and I think it is something that is very present and needs to be thought and talked about.

  3. I enjoy reading your post, thanks for all the tips – I appreciate, how you elaborate each point and how can someone apply it. You are a one great mom.

  4. I agree it is so important to show the older child/ children that the too can be part of your pregnancy. Giving them a special job will show them how special they are too x

  5. Excellent tips for new parents.. I am the eldest child in our family and I am happy to say that I still felt special when my 2 sisters were born..

  6. Great read and some great ideas if you all are expecting another child.Some parents actually do this , sometimes even ignore and sometimes avoid them. Thank Goodness I did not faced any of these as I am the only child. I hope everyone gets to know about this.

  7. Annemarie LeBlanc

    Fantastic tips. These are great ways of making the older child feel special and neglected. Involving the child in the care of of a younger sibling would not only reduce their jealousy, but it would also teach them to be responsible.

  8. My daughter and my eldest son are 5 years apart so there was sibling jealousy. I was able to address the issue by involving my daughter with the care of her brother like getting diapers, handing me the wipes or choosing a onesie that her brother would wear after his bath.

  9. It was very interesting for me – when my #3 was born, my 5 and 7 yo sure reacted differently to this. When my second one was born my 2 yo was sooooo confused – she actually thought that the baby was a part of mommy

  10. These are good tips. I know when my daughter was born, my son totally needed more attention. We always watched Tom and Jerry together while his baby sister slept!

  11. Kimberly @ Berly's Kitchen

    These are some great ideas! I was the older child, so I definitely know how it if feels to be overlooked because of a new baby. These are good things to keep in mind for a new parent.

  12. I agree. Spending quality, equal time is essential. I usually get my kids involved from the pregnancy and empower the “big sibling” in them so that way it’s not a surprise when the baby arrives. I keep them involved in the activities, such as feeding and diaper change, as well so they feel a part of the process.

  13. Jocelyn @ Hip Mama's Place

    Awesome tips! It was very exciting when we were about to welcome our second and I made sure that my eldest would understand what that meant and that he’s part of every step towards it.

  14. I did a mommy daughter date night once a week with my oldest when her little sister came along. It really helped her feel like the new arrival wasn’t going to infringe on our special bonding time.

  15. These are great tips! We are getting ready for our second child, and it has been a bit of a challenge to get our son to be excited to be a brother. However, a little patience and time with him has made a big difference. We also need to do some online shopping with Sam’s Club for diapers!

  16. I only had one child but it’s so important to make sure that your older child doesn’t feel left out when a new child joins the family. Thanks for thinking about that.

  17. Censie 'Mumby' Sawyer

    This is a great post. My son was 3 when my daughter was born. It was a challenge for him but we made sure he knew he wasnt being replaced. This is really helpful information for families expecting.

  18. I wish we had this issue. We adopted our son, and I told the birth mom we would take another if she got in “trouble” again. He was number six, and another never came along. It must be a delicate subject for a sibling, thanks for the advice!

  19. These tips are all great. My favorite and the one I always practice is the one-on-one time. It;s so important!

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