How do you handle bullying as a family? There isn’t much at all that a child’s parents can do to prevent their child from being a victim of a bully, other than educating him before it happens. They can, however, be there to support him if he is a victim of a bully. A bully is someone who is aggressive towards someone else using physical, verbal or psychological means of harassment. In today’s world, cyber bullying has taken the top spot. Here are some tips on how to deal with bullying as a family.
Tips For Dealing With Bullying In Middle School
Tips for Dealing with Bullying as a Family
Know the signs: Know you child and be aware of behavior changes. It may look a lot like depression where he is withdrawn or do not want to go to school. It may even start to affect him physically where he gets headaches or stomach aches. Talking to your child is very important, be very open and supportive. Reassure him that you will work with the school to stop the bullying.
Inform the school: Believe it or not, the school might not be aware of what is happening. There are so many students and not as many teachers, they simply can not watch everyone. They can’t stop what they don’t know is happening. Bullies do not want to get caught, so they are often careful to bully when they know no one is watching.
The cyber bully: This is a new breed of bully. Someone you and I never had to deal with in school. He is more of a coward than ‘the old days’ as he hides behind his smartphone or tablet. And there are more of them. Girls and boys and because they are hiding behind technology, they tend to say awful mean things. You have seen the tragic stories where kids have killed themselves because they can’t handle the bullying anymore. With Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and more forms of social media, the avenues of bullying are endless.
Anti-bullying strategies: It may be hard or scary for your child to do, but help to instill confidence in him to stand up to the bully with his words. He can say things like “You can say whatever you want, but it’s not true” and walk away. Using humor sometimes can alleviate a situation. Work with your child on positive images of himself to increase his self-esteem and give him the confidence to walk away and not let the bully get to him. This won’t happen overnight, but he can work on it with your help.
Outside friends: If your child is dealing with bullying at school, maybe think about involving him in some outside activities where he can make friends that are not at school. They can help to raise his self-esteem and keep him busy after school. Think about things like Boys and Girls Club, karate or some other activity not involving the school.
Support counseling: If your child is having trouble at school, find him a someone to talk to that is not you. Encourage counseling, it will allow him to talk freely to a neutral person. He may be apprehensive at first, and feel a little weird, but once he is comfortable he will more than likely feel better about himself and find ways to deal with bullying at school. He may even be able to help stand up for others he sees being bullied!
Bullying is not a part of growing up, it is not something everyone deals with, nor should they. The act of bullying has changed so much with technology, it is not just being pushed into lockers or having your books knocked out of your hands. It is very scary for kids these days and more than likely adults are not aware of it happening. The importance of being involved in your child’s life so they feel comfortable talking with you is key in helping to avoid bullying behavior and becoming a victim.
Has your family dealt with a bully? How was your child or the young person bullied? What was done to help stop the bullying? Share your stories with us below.
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16 thoughts on “Tips For Dealing With Bullying As A Family”
Thanks for these tips!
I was bullied as a middle schooler BUT I was not bullied on a regular basis where is was constant. Now with the social media it is easier for bullying to happen and people just do not think about what they say when it is over the internet and not face to face. I work in an elementary school and we do not allow it. When we see it happening we stop it as soon as it starts. Even if the student is just kidding with another or whatever it is not allowed.
I’ve been bullied, both as a child and mercilessly from other military spouses online at the same base. I do believe parents need to get involved with their children and let them know they are there, that your child CAN talk to their parents about this. Your parents are there to help you. Why must the child being bullied leave, make the bully leave. the problem is the problem that occurs when trying to solve a bullying issue. Bullying is NOT a “part of life”. when a child who is bullied fights back-they are the ones that get into trouble. It’s abhorrent.
I really wish people would stop lying, an saying teachers help. One or two may help. The rest are just as bad as the bullies. Want less bullying fire the teachers.. Hire someone who actually cares
As a teacher, this comment is absurd. You can’t make a blanket statement that of the thousands of teachers only two help. I have worked at schools where bullying is taken very seriously. I don’t know where you live or who you have encountered, but I assure you teachers DO care. Are there poor teachers, administrators, and schools out there? Yes, and that is unfortunate; but that’s also true of every profession. Most teachers do what they can when they are aware of the situation.
I like what you said, that ” Bullying is not just a part of growing up”.
My son is being bullied at school, he is 7. We asked for him to be moved to another class. The school administrators told us there was no way. We were then told that he needs to develop a “thicker skin”, “toughen up” and ” this is what real life is like”, and “the sooner he learns that, the better”. He has been acting so different that I actually thought he had inattentive ADHD. Every Monday, feeling nauseous.
He went from such a happy, sweet boy, to anxious and defensive, and angry. He is starting to cope better now, 7 mo. into the school year. I am thinking about homeschooling. I am willing to give up the enrichiment opportunities and “socialization” to have my tender hearted little boy back.
Bullying is a form of “socialization”. Not the kind any child needs. Make your own “enrichment opportunities” and homeschool him. It may take a while to undo the damage the public school has done but the rewards to both of you will be worth your time.
We had to deal with my daughter (age 6) having a bully this year. Having been bullied myself, I saw the writing on the wall. I encouraged her to stand up for herself first. When the bully didn’t listen and it became physical, we involved the teacher. It turns out this has been an issue with this girl and other students. I’ve kept the lines of communication with my daughter open and encourage her to keep speaking up for herself, but if it doesn’t work, talk to the teacher. So far, she still likes school and wants to go.
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I think it’s really smart to be watchful of the signs. It’s so prevalent now and it should be stopped as quickly as possible.
My daughter went through a bout of bullying for sticking up for a kid on her first day of school (not this year). Someone was really hurting someone else’s feelings, being mean about them being short. My daughter felt bad and piped in that some of her favorite people were short. The bullying turned to her and lasted most of the school year. Not a pretty situation to deal with at all. And it made school for her miserable when she’d previously loved it.
Great post. I know that bullying is such a terrible problem, made worse when a child goes through it without the support of their family.
I had a bully when I was in 6th grade….thankfully it was just for one year, but noone handled it at all…….the school knew, etc. I’m glad things have changed a tiny bit and it’s a conversation that most schools are at least having. More talk is needed!
So far thankfully we have havent had to deal with this. My oldest is 8 but Im sure in a few years she will encounter this situation. Great tips!
These are great tips! My son is in middle school right now and there are some mean kids out there! I’m sure these will come in helpful both for us and for him helping others in his class.
My son is getting older and I am trying to be proactive by reading up on stuff like this. I appreciate the tips and will be checking back to read more in case you have more on this topic.