Why is the second pregnancy tougher? No one told me about this. No one informed me that when I was tired, I wouldn’t be able just to lay down and take a nice nap, in all my pregnant glory. No, I was to stay awake and entertain the child I had already given birth to. I was to prepare meals and feed this child, do all the things I had already been doing to raise my little one while dealing with all the super fun side effects of being pregnant. No one told me the second pregnancy would be tougher, so I am passing on some of what I learned to you.
Related: Second Pregnancy Challenges: Caring for Yourself While Caring for a Child
Why Is the Second Pregnancy Tougher?
Exhausted and not allowed to sleep
Boy, do I remember this feeling. With my first pregnancy when I was tired (and at home), I took a nap. Most days in my first trimester I would come home from work and then just fall asleep on the couch for a few hours, only to be woken up for dinner and then bed. With my second pregnancy, I remember longing for those days, when I would just rest when I wanted to. But no, I had a child in kindergarten who was only going for half days, and I was working third shift. There was no sleeping for me…ever.
Cravings
This might not be just specific to a second pregnancy. However, it is much harder at times to fulfill your cravings when you have a small child with you all the time who also might want something similar. I remember just wanting to go through the drive-thru for a soda that I was craving or maybe some fries, but the thought of having to purchase a Happy Meal for the small person in the backseat made me do one of 2 things: avoid it completely, or tell a white lie and say they didn’t have any (I have done both, don’t judge me).
Going out can be tougher
Going out on a date night the first time around was easy! No sitter was needed, and you probably felt super cute and pregnant right? (or not, some don’t know that’s ok). But going out on a date night during the second pregnancy can be taxing! You need a sitter (which for me, I would rather put that sitter money into the baby fund). Also, ‘date night’ sounds nice, but getting some quiet, peaceful sleep sounds amazing no? Just getting my first born to bed on time and staying there would be nice.
Why is this not something they tell you about when you get pregnant with #2? Of course, when it’s all over, you get twice the handmade gifts on Mother’s Day, twice the snuggles and twice the fun. Is the second pregnancy tougher? Absolutely (unless your first pregnancy was a nightmare, then it may be a breeze!). But it’s totally worth it!
Being a mom of two & having C sections on both pregnancies I know how tough it is to go through with the second one. I very much agree that it will be so hard to find some time to sleep as your 1st child will always need your help on their basic activities.
These are good things to know for second time around mothers.
I only have one and plan on only having one so I have no opinion on a second pregnancy lol… However I could totally understand why it would be tougher!
We have four children and I remember when the allure of the second pregnancy wore off! It is definitely a whole new experience for mothers to go through. Well, then there was the third and the fourth…. nothing compares to the first, though!
Adding a second one is tougher because you have all the responsibilities of the first child to care for. Most people do not realize how hard it can be when adding a second, third or even fourth child.