Things You Should Never Say to a Stay-at-Home Mom

Check out these things you should never say to a stay-at-home-mom if you want to continue to be on her list of people she calls for "grown up" chat time!

Today we’re sharing a few things you should never say to a stay-at-home-mom! Being a stay-at-home-mom is definitely one of the most demanding jobs in the world. It’s a full-time position with a miniature boss who seems to have skipped over all the parts in the employee handbook that allow for lunch hours, private bathroom breaks, logical schedules or anything resembling a sane and orderly work environment.

To make it worse, SAHMs deal with people from the outside world disrespecting their career choice! Don’t want to be one of those naysayers who gets crossed off mom’s “list of people I call when I actually have five minutes for grown up talk”? Read on for a list of things you should never say to a stay-at-home mom!

Related: College Degrees for Stay-at-Home Moms

“Your house must be so clean”

For some reason, people equate being a stay-at-home-mom with being June Cleaver. Remember her, the pearl-wearing, “roast in the oven by noon” mom from Leave it to Beaver? They assume that because you stay home, you spend the whole day cleaning the house from top to bottom, all while wearing a 1950s style dress! WRONG! Kids are a lot of work right up until they leave the house for school. Moms spend most of the day chasing them around, entertaining them and teaching them valuable skills. They have about as much time left over at the end of the day as a mom who works outside the home.

“Do you ever feel like you’ve lost yourself?”

There are so many other alternative ways you can engage in conversation with a stay at home mom. Demeaning their career choice is not acceptable. They understand that your beliefs and home life is going to differ from theirs significantly. However, you should never assume that a stay at home mom has somehow lost herself in the shuffle and metaphorically forgot her name other than “mom.” Try asking what she does for her “me time” instead.

“I could never stay at home with my kids.”

This is an untruth. It may be more difficult for some in comparison to others, but all stay at home moms struggle on a daily basis. The choice to follow this path was never about what is easy. It’s about the kids. Plus, really, it makes it sound like you think your kids are little tyrants or something!

“You must be so tired of your kid by the end of the day”

Sure, every stay-at-home-mom has that moment where they feel like they’re going to scream if they have to sing “The Wheels on the Bus” one more time, or watch their child’s favorite episode of Blues Clues for the 100th time that month. Yes, they’re tired, all parents are tired at some point! But no, they’re not tired of their kid, and to imply such makes it seem like kids are a bother.

Being a stay-at-home-mom can get a little crazy. Maybe that’s an understatement! It’s also incredibly rewarding, though. Knowing that you were there to see all your child’s “firsts,” to teach and guide them, it’s a wonderful experience. Plus, SAHMs have an excuse to be silly any time they want, something every grownup needs in their lives! That was probably my favorite part! Don’t let anyone ever make you feel bad about your choice.

Can you think of anything else you should never say to a stay-at-home mom?

17 thoughts on “Things You Should Never Say to a Stay-at-Home Mom”

  1. It is very true that being a stay at home mom is such a big task & thus a demanding job as you can see it is really hard to find such people who dedicate so much for you. I think we have heard a of these & I think most SAHM’s are good enough to deal with it & move on.

  2. Yes, Yes, Yes, to all of these! One of the ones that drives me nuts the most is “It must be nice to get to sit at home while your husband works all day” because that is exactly what we do right? ugh!

  3. Lol I’d never say these to anyone. I hate when anyone says them to me, because most of the time they do with a snotty attitude. Drives me nuts. I’m not just a SAHM I work from home too!

  4. Oh my, people are really insensitive and sometimes just darn right not very smart. It is always good to be prepared with some great comebacks to surprise them with.

    I have always worked but retired at the age of 55 and I get some similar comments about being retired.

  5. After hours.. I hate hearing ‘Why are you on the computer so much’.. Well I get interrupted all day with my kids, homework, chores and cooking that when the kids are playing after hours or asleep, I have work to do that I can’t do during the day.

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